found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
