So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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