my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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