Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
one two three fourrrrnication!
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
