hotel room ftw
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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