Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
