and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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