their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
