so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
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I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I didn't notice because vodka
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The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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