There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize