I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I think pants incapable of making pants work
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