i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize
