pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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