East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Randomize