This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Randomize
