Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Randomize