So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
