I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
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