I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
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