wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
