She said her name was "party"
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
