Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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