I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
okay pat passed out under dana's car
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
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