Non-Jews are for practice
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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