i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
honey bunches of taint.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I wish you could order shots online.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
I currently don't understand fingers.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
