I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
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