Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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