"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
