Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
