the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
