____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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