what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
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I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
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Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
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