I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Randomize
