How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Randomize
