I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
