Are we in a gay sports bar?
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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