I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
