Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
