i may or may not be watching the land before time
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
