You work out of a Hotel?
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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