That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I just put wine in my tea
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize