Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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