Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
sarcasm needs its own font
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
