I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
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