you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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