i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
