I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
