For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
