Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
