Christians are straight up FREAKS
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
