There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
